What Is Forgiveness? Defined with 1 Interesting Scene
Jesus taught that forgiving one another is critical to gaining God’s forgiveness (Matt 18:35). But when does forgiveness come into action since God still disciplines us for our sins “due to love”? Consider the following scene.
A short scene on forgiveness
Dad: John! Why have you stolen your mum’s pen? Could you not have asked her?
John: I, I, I…
Dad: Shut up! You what? How dare you speak when I speak!
Did I bring you up in a disorderly manner or to be a thief? Answer… Answer… Answer my question. Useless child! You dare speak again and let me slap you!
Henceforth, you must do every household task, including the ones Linda, your younger sister, does.
Also, you must eat only after everyone has eaten. If food remains after our meal, you must wash all dishes before eating yours. But if no food remains, you wash the dishes and sleep—there is no food for you. Okay! Uuuseleeesss child! Get out of my sight!
John: Ah! Ah! Ah! Dad, I’m very sorry, please forgive me, the puni…
Dad: Shut up and get out of my sight, or else I’ll kick you out, nonsense!
Linda, dear, my perfect child, let’s go shopping. Hey, thief (John)! Make sure the dirty clothes, garden, and rooms are spotless before we come back.
From this moment, John’s relationship with his dad worsened. John’s dad continued to punish John at will while showing lots of favoritism to Linda (John’s younger sister).
Is there pain in forgiveness?
Notice that John committed an offense by stealing from his mum, which made his dad angry. Meanwhile, Dad’s reaction was to express his anger towards John and punish him. But did John’s dad handle the situation rightly?
Remember, Proverbs 13:24 teaches that whoever spares the rod hates his child, but the loved child is chastened betimes.
Moreover, in Genesis 3, God got upset with man (Adam and Eve) because they disobeyed HIS command, which made HIM punish them.
Besides, the punishments pronounced on Adam and Eve—millions of years ago—are still suffered by this generation and will yet be agonized by the next generation if Christ has not returned.
Does this mean God has not forgiven the sins committed by Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden—millions of years ago?
In fact, what exactly is forgiveness?
Forgiveness’ definition
According to the Collins dictionary, “forgive” means to “stop being angry with them and no longer want to punish them.” But when does forgiveness come into action if God still chastises us for our sins “due to love” (Hebrews 12:6-11; Proverbs 3:11-12)?
A teacher once wanted to punish one of his students for sleeping in class; however, the pleas of various eyewitnesses compelled the teacher to pardon the boy. Therefore, everyone was thrilled at the teacher’s decision—they considered the teacher kind for not punishing his student. This scene between the teacher and his student demonstrates how I felt forgiveness should work. However, it seems different from how God forgives man.
Nevertheless, given that Jehovah’s ways are perfect (Deuteronomy 32:4) and we are to emulate HIM (Matthew 5:48), can we conclude that a disciplinary leader is more forgiving than a tolerant head? By the way, what precisely is Jehovah’s way of practicing forgiveness?
How does Jehovah practice forgiveness?
To understand Jehovah’s mode of practicing forgiveness, let’s look at the events preceding the moment God punished man (Adam and Eve).
In Genesis 2:16-17, Jehovah specifically instructed Adam, saying, “¹⁶ Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat, ¹⁷ but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, you shall not eat of it.”
Additionally, God enlightened Adam and Eve on the consequence of disobeying the given instruction: “¹⁷ for in the day that you eat thereof, you shall surely die.”
Further down in chapter 3 [of Genesis], man failed to obey Jehovah’s instruction, which made God unhappy.
As soon as Adam and Eve were aware of their shortcoming, they were afraid because they already knew the consequence of their failure—death.
At this moment, Jehovah needed to show that HE is a forgiving God—as HE said in Exodus 34:6-7—by forgiving the sins of Adam and Eve. Remember, the Collins dictionary says “forgive” means “stop being angry with them and no longer want to punish them.” However, it seems God angrily punished man. Or are we missing something? Let’s find out.
Did God angrily punish Adam and Eve?
In the short scene preceding this write-up, John’s dad never allowed John to speak. Instead, he abused John and showed favoritism to John’s younger sister—even after punishing him severely. Therefore, John’s father demonstrated no sign of forgiveness towards John since he always used his anger to penalize John while showing favoritism to his younger sister.
On the contrary, in the case of Adam and Eve, Jehovah did not punish them because HE was angry. Instead, HE penalized them because HE earlier warned them that they “shall” surely die if they disobeyed HIS command (Genesis 2:17). Thus, they were guilty of sin.
Some might say, “But death was not the only punishment God proclaimed to man after their disobedience. HE decreed other painful penalties that man continues to suffer to this day.” Rightly said, God declared other punishments that Adam and Eve might have been ignorant of—but HE did this to man’s benefit.
How delaying man’s death is to man’s benefit
If Jehovah had made man die immediately, there would have been no opportunity for man to repent. Therefore, no man would have partaken of Jehovah’s glory, as God would have permitted eliminating human creation on account of sin.
However, God grants man the grace to live to give humans another opportunity to partake of Jehovah’s glory after death (which is man’s chief punishment).
Therefore, all human creation lives only on Christ’s grace—Romans 3:23. Yet, during this graceful period, God has enacted punishments that HE uses to remind us of the importance of obeying all HIS commandments—Exodus 34:6-7.
Moreover, due to HIS unconditional love towards us, HE further publicized the consequences of disobeying HIS commands in Deuteronomy 28:15-68. It is left to man to decide the path he will walk—either the route to eternal salvation or endless damnation (Joshua 24:14-15).
God’s proof of forgiveness
God proves His power of forgiveness towards human creation by not making our sight (or existence) keep HIM angry and no longer wanting to punish man. He only punishes when a person acts against HIS commandment—of which man is aware.
Furthermore, when HE punishes, HE carefully chooses punishments that can better help man obey HIS commands. Thereby disciplining him (or her) to be perfect—2 Samuel 12:1-25; Ephesians 5:1-21; Leviticus 11:44-45.
You may ask, “How does the Scripture’s forgiveness compare with the dictionary’s definition?” Let’s take a look.
Scripture’s forgiveness vs. dictionary’s forgiveness
Let’s examine how the Scripture’s forgiveness compares with the dictionary’s definition.
| Dictionary says | Scripture says |
|---|---|
| Forgiveness is to stop being angry. | The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy. HE will not always chide; neither will HE keep HIS anger forever. – Psalm 103:8-9 |
| Forgive means no longer wanting to punish. | If we confess our sins, HE is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. – 1 John 1:9 (see also Hebrews 8:12) |
The comparison above shows no difference between the dictionary’s definition of forgiveness and God’s mode of practicing it. The only problem is that most people misunderstand the differences between “discipline” and “wickedness.”
Discipline vs. wickedness
Discipline means teaching someone or oneself a specific skill. Some of the numerous tools frequently used to discipline a person are punishment (corrective pain infliction) and encouragement (positive).
Wickedness means resentfully inflicting pain on someone due to grudges held against that person. Punishment (resentful pain infliction) and encouragement (negative) are tools commonly used to act wickedly towards a person. Deceit is also a powerful tool for wickedness.
Free ticket to punish?
Since punishment is one of the tools God uses to discipline people, does this mean we should always punish those who offend us? No. Not at all. Remember, each of us will give an account of our actions on the day of judgment (including the reasons we chose to punish and methods we used.)–Romans 14:12; Matthew 12:36
Proverbs 13:24 also teaches that “he who loves him chastens him betimes:” This means we must cautiously decide on any punishment. Use chastisement as a mode of discipline only if you are confident the penalty will help the victim better obey God’s doctrines.
In all cases, any punishment proclaimed based on a grudge is simply wickedness—not discipline.
Forgiveness is neither about “punishment” nor “chastening.” Punishments and chastening are the consequence of sin (misconduct). In contrast, forgiveness is the act of ceasing to behave in an unlovely manner towards an offender. (Numbers 14:18-23)
Prayer point: Thank you, Jesus, for forgiving all my sins. Please lead me to pardon my offenders ungrudgingly. And help me to express your love habitually. Amen.